No Other Woman Movie: Realizations

The other day I downloaded the movie No Other Woman (sorry to those against piracy!) and I was watching it during break times at work.  I finished it and liked the movie, then asked hubby to watch it again with me two nights ago.  Surprisingly, I enjoyed the movie very much, and it may very well hit a spot in my top ten movies of my time (currently what's in my list are transformers - all three of them, and pretty woman - its a pretty short list now). I think the actors gave a superb performance. I'm not saying they can win best actors or actresses come awards night, but I personally think portrayed their characters very well.  The script was well written, with quite a few quotable quotes in there, and the plot was really so nice because it plays around what actually happens in real life.  That to me is the best thing.

(Spoiler Alert)
The movie plays around the lives of three individuals: Ram (Derek), Charmagne (Christine) and Cara (Anne).  Ram and Charmagne are married for 5 years, with Ram being a furniture salesman (or owner, wasn't clear in the movie) and Charmagne was a housewife.  Cara is the heiress of a successful businessman who happens to be developing a luxury resort, she's liberal and studied in NY.  Ram and Cara meet during one of the visits of Ram to the resort as he is one of the bidders for the furniture of the resort.  To cut the story short, they get into a relationship and Charmagne finds a way to confirm it, and in the end there was fighting, there was temporary separation, but all ends well as Cara leaves and Ram and Charmagne gets back together.

Being a wife myself, I feel the character of Charmagne.  And yet, I can't really blame Ram's character.  Ok, so you may think its all his fault.  I am not all for the getting into an affair is ok thing, but somehow I have come to accept the fact that men are not really that hard to spell.  An affair may not be the first thing on their minds, but offer them something in a silver platter (aka a girl saying that theirs is a non-committal relationship) and you have a guy sold.  Everyone wants freebies anyway.  So ok, in the end Cara falls in love, and apparently for the first time, and she decides to fight for Ram too.

There are soooo many realizations with this movie, I think I can't even spell them out in one post.  For one, wives can think theirs is an ideal marriage.  How do you know when there's something going on? Worse, how do you know something is amiss when your husband is acting normally anyway?  What is normal behavior?

When you're in the position of the wife who had been cheated on, how do you move on?  Or do you forgive at all?  This is a subject of discussion in the forum I'm in with mostly wives and moms.  You know what?  I've told myself over and over again that I don't mind one-night stands.  What I can't tolerate will be him getting into an affair.  I can't share him with anyone else.  But you know what, after watching that movie, I realize how much pain an affair can cause in a relationship.  I won't change my stand, but understand where the wife is coming from, having to leave the house to allow herself to heal.  I might have done the same thing, heal, then fight for him.  but that will only be after I see that he really commits to the marriage.  If he's staying just because and there is no love left, then why bother?  I'll show him what he's losing though?

In the end, I realize that more than preparing for a fight with the mistress, its important that a wife makes sure that she can be the other woman.  Be as desirable as you can be.  You can be a housewife (but not a boring housewife), a career woman, or a mom, but you have to also play the role of the mistress. That way, who would think to go astray?

Almost November!

The days are going by so fast nowadays.  Ever since we started the -ber months the days have been going on fast forward all of a sudden.  Not that I mind though.  I'm happy.  In two weeks we are already off to HK. Yey! Its a dream to see the excitement of my little girl on seeing the Disney characters, on seeing her happiness with the rides, stuff like that.  Last time we were there she was too young to know the characters except for Pooh, now that she's 4 years old she knows all the characters and I soooo look forward to her enjoying Disneyland.

They also declared two consecutive Mondays as holidays: October 31 and November 7. Yey for that. Time for rest and for me to fully prepare for my bazaar.

Then the bazaar weekend, Right now, at a little less than a month to go, I am down to only 17 more booths open for November and 20 for December.  Its the fastest so far, I expect bookings to flood in on the last two weeks of November, but at this point, I'm kinda hoping next week we can fill in the slots, or at least till we leave for HK.  Its not that far off anyway.  So happy.  December bazaar comes after, but I'm pretty confident about that too.

So the weekend will be spent packing up the bazaar flyers, ready for mailing by next week for most participants who did send in their address, and retrieving the addresses of those who didn't?

Overall its a happy time now.  The only downside I see right now is that unlike the past years, I'm not too keen on the halloween parties.  I guess this is mainly because we have something much more exciting to look forward to.  I don't have a costume yet for Jess.  And well, I'm not too excited about it at all.

Midweek - I want to destress!

Its only Wednesday and yet I feel like its been a long week and I can't wait for it to be over.  My Monday and Tuesday were really heavy days at work so today I just had to forget all the stress and (almost) did not any work done.  Well, part of it was having dinner with friends on a Tuesday night and getting home at 11pm to find Jess still up and wanting to play, so I really slept at past 12 already and woke up at 6am to cook food for the day.  Stress! At work I barely got anything done simply because I was way to tired to think.  My mind just hibernated.
So I'm on my way to bed now.  I got a bit of work done on the bazaar but I'm just not up to do any flyers designing this evening when I'm still on sleep mode. Hopefully tomorrow.

New Gadget Again!

This year has been a mixture of good and bad experiences for our family.  For one, I would like to think that this year was good for us financially and career-wise.  First we were able to get the company car, and since we had some savings, we were able to add some cash to upgrade the company car to an SUV (Ford Escape).  It makes us a bit more confident when it comes to heavy rains.

While we were drained financially when I miscarried last March, we were not exactly in a rut.  I'm really thankful that I had a great job that at least paid for all the bills, and hubby is able to save a bit while I cover most household expenses.  

Last month I was able to convince hubby to help me get a Macbook Pro.  Since my office laptop did not allow me to install Photoshop, I had to have a reliable laptop to use.  The laptop hubby was using had an LCD problem so he has to use it with a monitor, and that is not exactly handy.  The old netbook is being used by my college student-househelp, and its not also exactly the best in performance when it comes to Photoshop -- meaning it hangs a whole lot and is really frustrating (happened to me the first time I tried to make the backdrop for the bazaar).  Anyway, I digress. The MBP is now my home laptop.  The office laptop only goes home with me on weekends.  Its 12 months to pay at 0% interest so it isn't as heavy to pay.  Always been my dream gadget (yes, I've wanted this one ever since I can remember, and I can live without ever getting an iPhone but a Mac is one thing I've dreamed of owning).  

Now that the bazaar planning is already in the works, I've decided that the next business investment for me would be a DSLR.  

Background, since I started with organizing bazaars, I bought another business investment every run.  The past two years (2009 and 2010) it was for the digital printing business --- heat press last 2009 and the pvc card package in 2010.  This year we bought a DSLR.  Hopefully by 2012 we can already seriously start the digital printing business. Always told myself that I should make sure to teach the hubby how to do it in Photoshop since its not something I can do all by myself.  That's my target in 2012.  

This is what we got:  Bought it from Kimstore and although there was a slight glitch and I'm waiting for the replacement SD card, I'm happy with the ease in dealing with them.  Happy that we have this and hoping I can learn how to use this well soon!

Developing Jessica's Artistic side

This morning our family decided to go to Trinoma to have a little family time.  We had to leave early because we didn't want to have a hard time getting a parking space (QC malls are notorious to me for having limited parking spaces, no matter how big the malls are, same with SM Megamall).  We also had to drop by my mom and dad's house to give them some chicken nuggets so we went out early.  We did arrive at Trinoma around five minutes to 10am so we got a great parking space but the mall was still closed, we had to wait around 10minutes or so.  It wasn't too bad, except Jessica wasn't in much of a mood to go around walking.  We first let her play at Kevin's playroom at the Kids Zone.  The one hour there will give me and hubby some time to walk around the mall by ourselves, plus it lets Jess interact with other kids there.  I saw the Gymboree there also offered an hourly rate, but it costs a whopping Php 320 an hour, so I had to beg off on that, I should get a trial class instead. hahaha :-p  Anyway, we ate lunch after fetching Jessica when the hour was done, and so her wearing a pirate's hat and a sword.  Really cute but she removed it even before I got to take her picture. duh.

We decided to eat first before going around again, and unfortunately Jessica requested to eat at Jollibee and we didn't have much of a choice.  Gave her a jolly kiddie meal and she was happy for a while until she requested for something we couldn't understand (except for a word: yellow!).  After she was done crying we just told her we're going to the toy store and it improved her mood. We  went to Toys R Us and Jessica would point at so many toys she wants which I would reject because they seem pretty useless to me: stuffed toys, barbie dolls, pink wand, etc etc.  But she did point some stuff that would be useful like Megablocks, but she had those already and won't need new ones.  She then got this one and for me its pretty useful and would be something good to develop her artistic and creative side, which I think really has potential (hubby draws well and is good at this, I AM NOT! hahaha).  And its handy enough to bring anywhere. I may just need to replenish paints and crayons (and lots of paper) but essentially its easier to lug around because of the compartments and the retractable legs.  It costs Php 1,399.  But hubby agrees its worth the money.  So I went for it.  We also bought some drawing notebooks, more markers, poster paint and glitter paint (Jessica wanted these) at National bookstore.  I'm happy she loved it and used it immediately after we unpacked it.

 This looks like a laptop table.  She can sit on the floor or couch when the legs are used or use the table on top of a table when the legs are folded.

The paper can be locked in so it won't move while she's working on her artworks.  Notice too the slots above so she can easily place the watercolors in separate compartments.  I see these watercolor types in Japan home for 88 bucks so I know I have a problem once the first set runs out.

Under the blue cover comes separate compartments and free art materials: 8 watercolors, 2 containers for water, one of which has this great cover of using a brush, 5 markers (the ones we bought from National are already included here), two brushes and 12 crayons.  I was also able to sneak in the scissors - Jessica loves to cut paper.  

Clean up is pretty easy since we can easily wash or wipe it, whichever would be applicable.  I love it! 

I think this is more effective than the megasketch we bought just a week ago, which can be used by our next child anyway so I'm not too sad she doesn't use it much -- she was back to asking for bond paper after a day! :-D

And then my recurring thought is this.  I am glad and thankful that I have a good career that allows me to buy these things for her.  When she starts studying and we're spending 2x what we spend now on tuition fees, these gifts won't come off as easily. 

Car Maintenance

Ok, so today I had the new car scheduled for maintenance, its actually the third maintenance schedule for the 10,000km or 6months PMS (whichever comes first).  The sad thing about it is the mileage is only at 3,000 km. But since this is something we have to deal with because of the warranty, then it has to be done at the dealership.  Good thing about it is that hubby told the service advisor to use mineral oil instead of synthetic oil.  I mean, who needs expensive oil for 3 months use and like another 1000 km?  We barely use the car, I use it daily for a 4km trip to and from the office, so really, by how much can you really tire the car out, right.  So anyway, from the initial quotation of P 8,960, the actual bill came out at P5,894.47.  Whew, that's a whopping P2,000 off by just using mineral oil instead of synthetic oil.  The joys of having a husband who knows he's way around cars.  Now what I have to prepare for next is the next PMS, which comes around December. Whew another 5000 I think. :-(  Looking on the positive side, at least I am not paying for any amortization.  So this is enough I guess. :-)  Count your blessings, right?

Fixed!

Whew. That was a scare.  Ok updating my previous post.  I deleted some widgets and removed that hacked script. Whew.  Irritated.  Can't believe someone would hack my page.  Now more than ever I want to get my own domain.  But that's too much to ask now that I still have a lot on my plate.
Maybe some other time. :-)

Where'd my blog go??

Drat, someone might have hacked into my account and got through my blog.  I'm quite irritated.  I still do not know how it happened and what to do with it but I am posting anyway.  Not in a mood to check on it today, but believe me, I am sooo pissed!

Prepping for BFAS 3

Things are starting to get busy now.  I'm constantly in check of my personal emails because I have put out the announcements for the bazaar this November and December.  So here come the busy days.  I look forward to it of course, and I am also pretty excited since, 4 days into the announcement I already have several booths reserved.  That goes a lot in saying I've done a great job with the past two years.  Its really exciting.  I'm happy that the sellers are coming back.
This year is going to be different though because on the last day I will be out because of the wedding of my brother in law.  I'm not fearful though, I'm quite sure my parents would do a lovely job at the bazaar.  Me thinks I'll be there in the morning then leave it to them in the afternoon.  The wedding is at 6pm so I still have time for other stuff.  So no, I am not worried.  I can just leave the keys to mom and dad and have them bring back the stuff home.  Of course, I will miss the fun of the last day of the bazaar too. :-(
But its too early to think about that now.  I look forward to the busy days! and here's the ad for this year's event!

Meet the MAC OS Lion X

Ok, I'm not quite sure which comes first or last between these 3: OS Lion X.  Whichever it is I don't really care. Anyhow, I'm quite happy and satisfied.  When we bought Macky the other week I knew we were automatically qualified for an upgrade to the Lion OS X, since what is installed in the laptops are still the leopard versions.  The guy from PowerMac told us it generally takes around 2 weeks, so I was really happy when I got the email last night that gave the password for me to download the free upgrade (a $29.99 deal in iTunes!).  It was a whopping 3GB that had to be downloaded and I was getting up in the middle of the night.  I almost didn't get to finish the download this morning, luckily it did and I was able to install it before I went to the office.  I'm so far happy with it, like shifting from a Windows XP to a Windows 7 (pardon the comparison, but its the simplest way to say it!).  I've yet to learn all the other perks of this new OS, but so far I'm liking it.  In the scheme of things though, in so far as Mac expertise is concerned, I'd say I'm 5 out of 10! Lots to learn still!!!!

Short Family Day

Spent a few hours today checking out SM Masinag.  Well, its my second time there and the first for he kid and the hubby.  Didn't spend too much time too. Just went to buy some books for the little girl, and then she and hubby found nice shoes at Payless. Then spent some time in the grocery buying meats and veggies for the house.
Someday I wish I can do some unique dishes.  Kinda getting tired of the usual: menudo, nilaga etc stuff.  Looking to cook something unique the next time.
P.S. Nice to be back to blogging for a change.  My Macky is effective in making me a good blogger again!

Angelica's birthday

Today is August 13.  Four months ago, I was prepared to be in the hospital at this exact date, giving birth to our second baby daughter, Angelica.  God had other plans, and Angelica is now with Him in heaven.  But of course, I can't keep out the sadness of the what could have beens.  Like, I could have been holding this little girl in my arms now. Changing diapers and breastfeeding.  Life as I know it now may have been different.  But God had plans.  I am not questioning them of course.  I'm quite sure our little angel is watching over us now.  I did light a candle for her though.  For my sweet angel who's in heaven.
Happy, Happy birthday Angelica!

Got my wish! ME and MACKY!

For so long a time, I've wanted a macbook.  It wasn't just a spur of the moment thing, it was the type of thing I wanted to own because I loved how it looked and its a perfect tool for my creative side (ok, i'm not that creative, and windows can do the same things, but a mac looks so much nicer!).  And for me, if ever I were to buy another laptop, why waste money on another windows-based laptop (no matter how powerful) when all I really want is a mac?  But its just too expensive, right?

So anyway, fast forward to a few months after.  I had to have my office laptop reformatted because the system we use in our office got corrupted (by Adobe Photoshop... so they say).  After that, I was told not to install photoshop there so I won't corrupt the system again.  Problem is, I've been meaning on working on the digital printing business for the longest time, and I need photoshop for that.  The only laptop with Photoshop now is the netbook, which is also being used by my studying housekeeper, and I don't really want to deprive her of that.  Besides that, its also so slow, that it takes a while getting anything done.  

So really, I'm just justifying that I needed the mac, the VERY EXPENSIVE MAC, which by the way, I can't pay in cash.  Now comes the tricky part!  I was looking through the internet for possible sellers and all of them are actually pricing the mac the same way.  I was really hoping I can get something that would allow me to pay it in installment.  And then it hit me that perhaps, we can transfer some of hubby's credit limit so that its converted to an SIP (Installment credit line).  And when I called the customer service of the bank, they said its possible.  Next hurdle is to convince the hubby.  This was not too difficult since he knew I had the means to pay for it if its installment anyway.  And I was only plotting for a simple white macbook but he was the one who told me I should get a macbook pro instead.  So in the end, he agreed.  And here we have my new baby!  Its not paid yet, but i love it to bits!  Here's to many years of friendship for me and my mac!

Week end ends.

Ok, so its 7:30 pm Sunday and there goes the weekend.  We've just had dinner. Stayed at home the whole day, and yesterday too.  Well, yesterday after work the yaya asked to go out, and the other one went to school, so we just stayed at home and rested.  Like I said in my previous post, saturday is not such a good time to go out. Come sunday, we initially planned to go out in the afternoon.  I just went out to go to the wet market in the morning and did some cooking too. Planned my menu for the week.  I might be out next weekend.  Poor Jess won't be seeing the mall for 2 weeks at least.  I'm sure she'll get over it though. hahaha....
Will just make it up to her the following week, as am not quite sure if I will be in Cebu this weekend.  :-)

In other news though, our weekend was spend eating.  This week I was in a "cooking" mode so I was able to do a lot of cooking.  Pancit, crispy pata, champorado, dinuguan (not so good since the blood seemed old and had a bad smell) and calamares.  It was good to be back on the groove.  I am still hoping that one day I can still be in "experimental" cooking mode and mix up something I saw on TV.  I like watching all those cooking shows: Iron Chef, Top chef, Masterchef Australia, Barefoot Contessa, and Everyday Italian.  I really like their recipes.  If I did not have Saturday classes I might even have enrolled in some cooking classes.  Howell. Someday.

Hope everyone enjoyed their weekend.  Good night and have a productive week ahead!

Weekend mode: Mall review

We finished our management meeting early today, started at 7:45 and ended at 9:30.  So I'm now spending the last one hour in the office alternating between doing this price monitoring worksheet, checking FB, and blogging. I rather like that this is a no-pressure day, and it will be a no-pressure weekend as well.  No commitments this weekend, though I am contemplating going to the mall, but really wondering which mall it would be with not too many people, and no traffic to deal with.
Saturdays are hell days in terms of traffic in our area these days.  Marcos Highway, which will lead us to Quezon City, Manila, and all other areas in the north, is really heavy on saturdays, what with all that drainage construction ongoing, there's only one or two lanes open and the volume is big on this day (don't know why, it seems people from the East (Rizal) simply like to travel on saturdays.
I also don't like overcrowded malls on Saturdays and Sundays. Harder to park.  Lots of people walking around, especially in my favorite mall which happens to be Megamall.  Somehow, the other big malls don't appeal as much to me (Eastwood, Galleria, The Block, Trinoma and MOA).  It's just not my type of format.  I like that Megamall is one simple mall, only two sides and not many sidestores/hallways you can get lost in.  Plus it has all the amenities you need: grocery, hardware, cinema, department store (large selection too!). Fave stores: Payless, Toy Kingdom.  Its a no-brainer mall.  And its middle class.
If I wanted the ambiance of a high end store though, I think the place to be is Rockwell.  Hubby and I share the view the Rockwell is a nice place to be to see lots of "beautiful" people, models, artists, rich classy businessmen.  Its the only place where you see the old rich ladies all dressed up in the grocery. :-)
We also have several malls nearby, but they don't really satisfy my taste and preferences all too much.  IMHO, they are malls to frequent only when you need something and are either too lazy to go to a bigger mall, or in such a hurry that you buy one thing only.  Like last week, it took me 10mins in and out of Toys R Us in Robinsons Metroeast just so I can buy a gift for a party we're already running late to.  Imagine that.  No time to search for an ultra cool gift. I got the most educational thing I can find and bought a card and paperbag. I call it cramming! LOL
Well, now I'm about to start my weekend and I'm wondering if I want to go to the mall later.  The little girl hasn't been out the whole week (Hubby and I went to Megamall thursday to watch transformers).  And next week she may also be stuck at home IF my out of town trip is cancelled.  So now I wonder if I want to go out. Hmmmmm...

How do you start doing other things you love to do?

(DISCLAIMER) I am practicing typing on the iPad. So if you find some typo errors on this post, I blame it on the iPad.
I'm too lazy at home to be productive in anything else. I know I should really be more productive. Sometimes I think it also has to do with the fact that I have two yayas/house help at home so I really don't need to do any household chores. Since there is only one child to look after, and not many chores to do at home, I would really have to exempt myself from chores otherwise I'd feel like I was overpaying them. Problem though, I am too lazy to do other things, like perhaps do some digiscrapping or some arts and crafts, or start working on the digital printing business.
I do hope I will find the energy to start an evening routine soon, though I am not really guilty that I don't do Anthony, because I also know that the time at home should also be spent with the family. And I am happy that I have lots of that time for hubby and Jess.

Here come the Rainy days

Last friday brought a a lot of rains to Metro Manila. And it was scary.  But looking at the glass half-full, we felt blessed in a lot of ways.
First, we were able to go home, though not to early, we were braver in going through the flooded roads inside our village since we were riding our Escape, rather than the black Sentra.  Now we feel that it was indeed a good choice to get this car rather that settle for a car (it cost us much more since we had to add equity to pay for the upgraded car).  But seeing that we can go through 5-6 inches of water makes if so much more worth it. For the past three years when a situation like this happens we were forced to wait it out near the village gates, where we would have to stay for 5-8 hours until the roads are passable. So for instance, if we arrived there at 6 or 7 pm and the roads aren't passable anymore, we would need to stay there for up to 2 am.  Add to the anxiety that there might be some water inside the house (will get to that later) and we're not there to help.
Second, this weekend's floods were really scary, but thank God that we were spared from an Ondoy-like situation.  Some water came into the house from underneath and there were flashfloods inside the village, but all in all the situation was manageable.  We had to do some cleaning Friday night but only the floors, we managed to lift most of the stuff out of floor level (except of course so heavy appliances) so there's no damage to any of our stuff.
Third, our office (being 10minutes away from home) was almost flooded, but thankfully it was spared. Highest level was at 35", a few inches shy of the floor levels of the plant and the office, but it didn't get into the plant.  If it did, it would mean a lot of damage and longer days and nights for everyone in the office.  So yes, I am so thankful that we were spared with that.
Life really has a way of reminding us of the many blessings we have day to day.  And this is one case where I am really thankful for the blessings (even if it is disguised as a typhoon.) :-)

Miscarriage at 20 weeks ... Our story

March 20 AM - I decided to treat myself and my daughter to a bonding day at the mall (In cubao).  So we went out, had her play at the playroom there while I went around naman and did a little window shopping.  Got home around 3pm

March 20, 6PM - I felt this GUSH of WATER come out of me all of a sudden, similar perhaps to the bag of water bursting to those who are on term already.  I don't know really, I didn't experience this when I gave birth to my first daughter.  Anyhow, I called my OB right then and there since it just continued to drip, and she advised us to go to the hospital.  We went to TMC. They tested the fluid and it came out as amniotic fluid na nga.  They confined me and put me on bedrest.

March 21 - My birthday.  Short of saying the saddest yet most memorable bday so far.  Good thing no plans were made yet, since I'd end up cancelling them anyway.  Had ultrasound, blood tests, urinalysis. Bedrest and IV the whole day. Ultrasound results indicated my amniotic fluid level was at .88cm. Two weeks ago when I had another ultrasound, the level was at 5.3cm.  The heartbeat of the baby was strong though, and I can feel her strong kicks.

March 22 - Spent the day in waiting. Bedrest still. We waited for the OB but she never came and just texted me that its too soon for a repeat ultrasound.  Despite the difficulty, I could still feel the baby moving.

March 23 - OB visited us, and we told her we wanted to go home already and i preferred to be at home instead.  After all, hospital bedrest isn't helping, what with nurses coming in every 2 hours for vitals and I can't even get enough sleep.  I can feel the baby fighting and I know I would fight for it also, but being away from my daughter isn't calming me at all.  My bitchiness is starting to set in.  My OB instead, told me the baby will go out TODAY OR TOMORROW! She tells us there is no chance of survival, she will just monitor it since it will surely come out in a day or two.  She advised the nurses to transfer me to the labor room for "monitoring".  It was the longest 4 hours of my life.  They were monitoring contractions (NON-EXISTENT) and heartbeat of the baby (STRONG!) and I can feel her kicking all the while. And then somebody would go to me and ask me what happened and I'd have to narrate it again (sometimes I declined) and I'd end up crying.  Finally I said wanted to go back to my room.  If baby was fighting, who am I to give up on her.  So they transferred us back to the hospital room. My daughter was also there and it lessened the sadness I really felt.

March 24 AM - Against my OB's advice, I said I wanted to go out and have the bedrest at home.  The hospital expense is piling up, I don't trust my OB, and I can feel the baby fighting. I missed my daughter.  My hubby and I decided instead to go directly to another OB (one I visited when I miscarried last year), for a second opinion.  She advised for another CBC and another ultrasound before I left.  The heartbeat was still good but the fluid level is still going down (meaning the tear isn't healing yet).   So we were discharged from the hospital

March 24 PM - We visited the other OB and though her prognosis was that the chances are really slim at 90%bad, 10%good, she did say it can take days or weeks to finally come through (the miscarriage). I guess it was then that we finally accepted that the baby may not really survive, but I was still carrying on that as long as I can feel the baby fighting, then I will.  She even checked the baby on the ultrasound and heartbeat was still good so she was positive about it. I was happy to be home with my daughter that I missed so much!  until I slept that night, I could still feel the baby. 

March 25 - At 6am, I was feverish, and desperately waiting for the baby to move, but NADA. By 6:30, I was having chills already and my teeth were chattering.  It was not good, I knew the baby was gone, and it seems my body was really fighting the infection. Hubby rushed me to Cardinal Santos where my new OB is.  I came in with a 40.2degree fever.  when I went into the labor room it was 39.8.  They tried looking for the baby's heartbeat but it was gone.  They transferred me to the labor room already for induction, put me on IV/oxytoxin.  I had to push the baby out because they didn't want her disfigured if they pull it out.  Finally delivered her at 3:15pm.  Slept through the D&C and they woke me up only before transferring me to the recovery room. 

It was the recovery room period that was really troubling, since my blood pressure levels continued to drop.  They had to put 3 doses of epi on me to push up the BP only for a while.  I was supposed to be back the room by 5:45 but my BP was at the 77-80 levels so they couldn't let me out.  At 6:30 they finally decided to have blood transfusion (2 bags). I was finally released back to the room at 1:30AM the following day.

March 26 - OB referred me to a Cardio for 2D echo and ECG, because she feared the BP levels and the high heart rate I had the day before may have other effects. I was still on IV antibiotics and continuous monitoring of BP and temp.

March 27 - finally discharged from the hospital.  

The baby was already fully formed. Right now, we've already accepted that she's gone and she will always be our little angel looking at us from heaven.  We're positive that someday, God will give us another one, when the time is right.

Back to blogging post

Ok, so two months is again a long time for me to go back.  I even planned on a Project 365 but stopped right smack on January (1st or 2nd week). Duh.  Well, time for me to do some creative thinking since spending Saturdays here in the office without the management meeting can be really boring.

Well, anyway, lots of updates up ahead.  I guess I should make a long post in case I don't get to blog again in a month! I'll just number my updates so I get to see just where I am right now and hopefully the next time I read it I get to give better (and more up to date) updated.

1. On Jessica.  Jessica will be graduating Nursery on March 25. Yey! I always laughed and said I only had 16 years to go to have a daughter with a college degree. yey!  But anyhow, I heard from her teacher she'll be 2nd or 3rd place in her nursery class (of 8 students! LOL).  I really don't want to sound too proud of her, but I am happy that at the minimum effort, she has actually been a great student and eager for school.  To think I just wanted her to interact with other kids, and still she managed to get good grades.  I've seen a lot of improvements too.  She can identify letters, numbers, she can count, she can color well.  And my oh my, can she speak well.  She speaks like she's 7 years old.  Its so nice to be in a conversation with her because she really can speak like a normal adult.  I'm really happy how she turned out with one year at school.  I won't be enrolling her in the same school but with a bigger one, since now we can more or less afford a better school. But nevertheless I am happy with her experiences on her first preschool year.

2. On Baby No. 2. Well, she's a GIRL! I went for an ultrasound yesterday (hey, I've always said I had really short EQ, so I HAD TO KNOW).  We would have wanted a boy of course, so we can stop at 2 kids, since a 2nd girl brings about the pressure of a baby no. 2.  But I can't be all sad knowing we're gonna have another baby girl who I can dress up again, and who I know will be really cute and look like me. :-)  And I am happy, she's as trouble free as Jessica was, and so I know she will just be as smart and pretty.  Baby boy will have to  wait, if at all, at least another 3 years (still subject for discussion though).

3. On Household stuff.  Well, nothing much has changed.  The house is till the house, not much renovation.  One major change coming up though is that I am gearing up Jessica's nanny (and our all-around) for school.  I told her time and again that I was willing to pay for her education, so I made my research with the nearby college here in Cainta called ICCT.  The tuition is quite affordable at 5k per trisem for a bachelors degree, and I guess its money I am willing to let go to see that my yaya will have a good future someday.  I planned her to be in school for the afternoon sessions, that's 3-7pm.  So in the morning she can tend to Jessica first, who will go to school mornings.  In the afternoons normally its just sleeptime for them anyway.  She usually does housechores in the morning.  Well, when I called up the school regarding their entrance exams I learned that they require a 75% passing mark in the exam to qualify for a bachelor's degree, so that put pressure on me for yaya to pass. I don't want her to take a vocational course because a bachelors course could take her farther.  So I bought her reviewers and told her she can study first before taking the test.  Hopefully she will pass.  Its been 3 or 4 years since she graduated high school so she has a lot of catching up to do.  And so plans are already made to ask for the yaya no. 2 to come in 2 months earlier than my EDD.  Though it will be an added expense, its ok since it will take a load off my having to do household chores too, specifically cooking and going to the market.  Its a plus that this new yaya is a friend of my yaya now so I hopefully will have less worries of them not getting along.  I don't want to have to deal with that stress.  That said, I still will need to buy them a double deck bed and an additional closet space.  But its a plus that the new helper worked in our neighborhood before so she knows the stress come the rainy days (i.e. potential flooding).

4. On Career.  Work has been fairly easy and less stressful these days, probably because I already know my job now so I can deal with it easily, as I always do.  Oh, and we already got my company car, which we paid to upgrade from a Vios to a Ford Escape.  We wanted something bigger for the rainy days.  Before we wanted to get an Innova but we found it too expensive for being too bare.  So we got the Escape instead.  I also get 100L free gasoline with it so it helps take a load of fuel expenses.  Hubby prefers not to use the car on weekdays to Makati because its easier for him to commute.  So technically, 100L of gas can take us weekends out malling or to go around a bit, plus every once in while to go out of town.  Oh, and I already get to drive to the office by myself.  So in a few months time, I'm sure I can go out on my own already! :-p

hmmm... that's that for a while.  I have not blogged about the biz or or recent trip to Baguio. I hope I can do that soon enough,

till next time!

January 2: Malling and Haircut for Jessica

Today rather than to stay at home and say goodbye to the last day of the holidays, we decided to go to Megamall for some family time.  That is after I finished packing up the Christmas tree and all the lights and decor.   Now that the home space if free from the clutter of the Christmas season (except for some gifts that I need to give away), there is more free space for the little girl to play and run around.  But I digress, so we went to Megamall, got to see the new Toy Kingdom (which is huge), ate at the Food Court (Sizzling Plate), then brought the little girl to Cuts 4 Tots for a haircut.  Jess' hair has already grown and we decided to cut it down by 2 inches  (its actually still too long, might need another haircut in a month or so).  After the haircut the girl asked to play at Kidz Republic.  So we left her and her yaya (who is fresh from a 2day vacation btw) and went around the mall.  After getting her back we finally went to Girbaud where I was able to buy a wallet for me and for my sister who's having her birthday tomorrow.
On the pregnancy: I still have not gone to the OB, will probably do so 2nd or 3rd week of January, where hopefully the baby's heartbeat will be there already.  Meanwhile I am religiously drinking the vitamins (folic acid + prenatal vitamins) to keep healthy.  We are hoping this will be a good pregnancy now and come around August we will have the newest member of the family.

Oh btw, this is the second days of (hopefully) Project 365.  Off to a good start, I hope to finish at least with half and I will be happy.

2010 Recap

The past year has been so memorable (in both good and bad ways) that it deserves a recap.  I feel I should keep this in mind because someday when I look back, 2010 will be the year with the most challenges for me and for our family.
We started the year with me jobless (by choice, and hoping for a good year ahead with the bazaar business.  At some point I know I will have to look for a job back at corporate because it was hard for us to save with me just into business.  All of hubby's salary was going to daily expenses.  I had a bazaar coming up but that didn't turn out well.  In the end it was a frantic search for THE next job. Unfortunately the next 2 job offers that came were not to my liking, not even close to what I had with the Selecta job.  And hubby patiently told me to hold off until I find what is worth me.
So careerwise, things started getting better when I got this interview with a food manufacturing company whose office is just outside our village. It was a pleasant surprise that it was so near, and the position they were offering was really something I liked.  It took a good month and a half before I got the offer and it was really a dream come true.  A good career position, directly under the General Manager's supervision, with great benefits and competitive salary.  I had under me 5 staff to supervise, and the real plus part is that the office is just outside our village.  It is truly a dream.  Of course, dreams don't last forever and now that I have it, its no bed of roses, but I'm learning and its a matter of time before I can excel in what I do, just as I always do.
Homewise.... we started the year without a helper/yaya after I fired the previous one (for abuse of authority --- aka shouting and harassing my little girl). I was a full time homemaker for a total of 3 months.  No regrets though, being able to take care of my girl, no matter how difficult, is really something to be proud of, in a modern world like ours, not all careerwomen get the opportunity to stay home full time to take care of their kids and watch them grow up.  In February we finally had a new helper/yaya, and she is heaven-sent!  I can't begin to say how she has become family to us and I do hope she stays with us for a long time.
And then I thought we were going to have someone new in the family.  Found out I was pregnant sometime in October, but that ended soon with a blighted ovum.  It was a sad and trying time, having had an easy pregnancy with Jessica, this came as a surprise.  But then I had to be strong and we just decided to try again. After the miscarriage we hoped we could have it easy and and fortunately it paid off.  I haven't gone to the OB yet but the last 2 home pregnancy tests came positive so I am hoping this one will take off, and smoothly too.
Since June, things have started to get better for us, a new job, great career ahead, financial stability.  Finally we have enough to live a more comfortable life.  Hopefully in 2011 we will have an additional member of the family too.
So I hope things will go well for you too.  :-)